Dijon: A Kid's Point of View
Label: Zomba Gospel Group
Song: A Kid’s Point of View
Writer: Kirk Moore
Ministry: Union Congregational Church
Location: Somonauk, Illinois
By the end of this study, students will have discussed the pain so many young people have felt. They’ll learn about resources for students who are living through (or have been through) the divorce of their parents. Most of all, they’ll experience God’s unconditional love.
Note: This study deals with the pain and reality of divorce. Some students may be living through the pain of divorce as you lead this study. Some may have just recently been through it. Having extra leaders to provide comfort for students for whom this is very "close to home" would be an excellent idea for this meeting.
Word Association: This game can be played with a small or large group. Ask players, "Tell me the first thing that comes to your mind when I say…" Enforce these rules: No proper nouns and no more than a one-second delay in answering. (Break the rules and you’re out.) Inform the students that the winner will get (you decide the "gala" prize. Make it a pretty good one.) Start by asking all students at the same time. After several are "out," start playing by arbitrary rules ("I don’t like that association – you’re out!" or "If you can’t spell that word then you’re out" etc.) When you have 3-5 people left in, call them all out because you’re tired of the game. Take the prize and throw it in the trash can.
Say: It’s probably not fun to play a game where everyone thinks they can win a great prize and in the end every one loses and the prize goes into the trash. It wasn’t fair of me to lead you to think someone would win the game. I could have told you that no matter what you did you would lose, but if I did that, you probably wouldn’t play. Unfortunately, this "lose only" game is similar to the all-too-real circumstance of divorce. Most of you have friends whose parents have divorced. Some of your parents are divorced. No matter what the circumstance, nobody wins in divorce. Children especially wish that things could be back the way that they were before all the pain began. Today we’re going to watch a video from a new Urban Gospel/Rhythm and Blues artist named Dijon. In the song, A Kid’s Point of View, he shares feelings that may be similar to yours and to your friends. During the song, write down a few phrases or make a few sketches of images that come to your mind. If you’re willing we’ll discuss them later.
Play "A Kid’s Point of View" from Dijon.
During the song, have students write sentences or make drawings about how the song makes them feel.
Say: "I’ll give up every single penny in my piggy jar - Just to get things back to the way they were" The singer is stuck with a longing for the way things used to be. He realizes that things have changed and they’ll never be the same, but like many who have lived through divorce, he wishes it could be the way it was. Let’s explore how God promises us comfort in the most painful times.
Let’s start right with the subject of divorce. Here’s what Jesus said:
Have a student read Mark 10:2-12 aloud.
Say: Here’s a "Let’s really dig deeper into the verses" moment.
In Palestine at the time Jesus was speaking to the Pharisees, Jewish men held all the cards. When it came to divorce, they made the rules. Within that context, there was a debate that raged. Two views about divorce. On one side was the view that divorce was permitted only in the case of, well, cheating. Another, more popular view was that a man could divorce his wife for any reason. Things like bad cooking, having a strong opinion or not correctly following customs were adequate grounds for divorce. Divorce was common in Jesus’ time -- but the men still were the ones who did the divorcing. They issued a certificate to their wives and the divorce was final. When the Pharisees asked Jesus whether divorce was OK, he answered a different question.
But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."
Jesus talked about divorce in equal terms. Equal terms! He knew that women had no power or status. But he talked about marriage and divorce with men and women on equal terms! I can imagine that the people Jesus talked to heard that much louder than anything he said about divorce itself did.
Ask: What are your thoughts on this interpretation of the Bible verses?
Say: The pain of divorce for everyone involved is real. Everyone involved is valuable and needs
God’s comfort. Let’s look at ways to express and receive God’s comfort in painful times.
Invite students to share what they wrote or drew during the video.
Have students read Romans 12:10, 1 Thessalonians 5:11 and Hebrews 10:24 out loud. (The New Living Translation does a great job bringing these verses to life for students.)
- How do we love each other with genuine affection?
- What ways can you think of to encourage and build each other up?
- What would you do to encourage each other to outbursts of love and good deeds?
- How will any of that help with the pain kids feel from divorce?
Say: Divorce is heartbreaking, and I know that it is not the ideal God intended. But I don't think Jesus ever wanted us to take a painful situation and make it worse. In the pain of divorce, we don't need to kick someone hurting from that pain when they are down. Everyone -- husbands - wives -- in-laws - children affected by and involved in a divorce experience pain. Everyone is still a precious child of God - and God loves all
- Divorce is heartbreaking and painful for everyone involved.
- Kids often wish things could be the way they used to be.
- God’s plan is for couples to be married for life – But God loves everyone involved in divorce, too.
- We can be a source of encouragement to people who are in pain from divorce.
- God’s love is unconditional.
God of love and comfort, thank you for hearing us and loving us even when we are going through terrible pain. Help us to receive the comfort you bring and to offer your comfort to one another. Help us to encourage each other to show love instead of hate. Most of all, o God, please help us to love you and to love one another. Amen.